If you wanna be my lover...
Two speakers debate the best term to use when introducing a romantic partner, with one strongly advocating for 'lover.' They discuss why terms like 'partner' feel too businesslike and why 'lover' strikes the right balance of seriousness and playfulness in a relationship.
Summary
The conversation begins with one speaker, Bory, explaining that when dating someone, he tells them to introduce him to their family as his 'lover.' His conversation partner pushes back, suggesting this assumes a lot, to which Bory playfully agrees.
The speakers then evaluate various terms for a romantic partner. They mock the idea of using 'partner,' arguing it sounds overly formal and transactional — like a business arrangement rather than a romantic relationship. 'Light of my life' is also dismissed as sounding too funereal or eulogy-like.
The conversation settles on 'lover' as the preferred term. Bory argues that 'lover' is a 'grown ass term' that works regardless of gender. He describes it as conveying a sense of deep connection without taking life too seriously. Crucially, he frames 'lover' as a word that captures the full complexity of a mature relationship — one where you can have serious conversations about money and finances, and also be physically intimate. The term signals both responsibility and fun.
Key Insights
- Bory argues that 'lover' is the ideal term to use when introducing a romantic partner, and finds it hilarious and bold to use it in social settings like a friend's birthday party.
- Both speakers agree that 'partner' is a foul term for a romantic relationship because it sounds like a business negotiation rather than a romantic connection.
- The phrase 'light of my life' is rejected by one speaker as sounding too much like something said at a funeral rather than a celebration of a living relationship.
- Bory defines 'lover' as a grown-ass term that transcends gender and signals someone who doesn't take life too seriously but is deeply connected to the other person.
- Bory characterizes the ideal 'lover' relationship as one mature enough to discuss budgets and debt seriously, and then be sexually intimate afterward — framing it as a term that captures both responsibility and passion.
Topics
Transcript
[0:00] I've had this conversation many times with people I've dated because this comes up. They go, "What do I tell my family?" I say, "You tell your family I'm your lover." >> Okay. Okay. That That's assuming a lot, Bory. >> Well, go ahead and assume, babe. >> Okay. You prefer lover, nothing else. >> I think it's hilarious. I think >> I think it's hilarious. >> I think hilarious >> to go to like a friend's birthday party of like the person you're dating and for them to to be like, >> "My lover's coming in. My mate is coming in. >> My mate, this is my lover." Because partner, I'm sorry. No. [0:32] >> No. Foul. >>…
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