The Lesson Every Dad Should STEAL 🤯
A father shares his parenting philosophy of refusing to simply solve problems for his son, instead encouraging him to find alternative solutions on his own. He illustrates this with a specific example of his son struggling to climb a hill out of a creek. His core belief is that there is always another angle or avenue to accomplish any goal.
Summary
The speaker is asked how he instills drive and ambition in his children, given his own achievements. He reflects that while his son is loving and caring, he is still discovering what his personal drive is. Rather than trying to define that drive for him, the father focuses on teaching problem-solving resilience.
His primary method is to refuse easy assistance when his son gets stuck. When his son asks for help, the father redirects him, insisting there is always another way to solve a problem. He wants his son to develop the habit of looking for alternative approaches rather than immediately seeking outside help.
He shares a specific, memorable example: his son was playing in the creek and couldn't climb up a steep hill to get out. When the son asked to be pushed up, the father refused and instead pointed out a less steep section of the hill nearby. This moment crystallized his parenting philosophy — that for virtually any obstacle, there is a better angle or path available if you take the time to look for it. He now consistently applies this approach, pushing his son to find his own avenues to achieve what he wants.
Key Insights
- The father admits he does not yet know what his son's personal drive is, but deliberately avoids imposing one — instead focusing on teaching the process of finding solutions rather than defining the goal.
- The father's core parenting rule is to refuse to simply solve problems for his son, telling him 'you need to figure another way out' whenever he asks for direct help.
- The father argues that for any problem a person will face in life, there is always an angle that can be taken to accomplish what you want — and that recognizing this is a foundational life skill.
- The creek hill incident — where the father pointed out a less steep section rather than pushing his son up — is identified as the first moment this philosophy 'clicked' for him as a concrete parenting approach.
- The father frames his role not as a helper who removes obstacles, but as a guide who redirects his son's attention toward solutions that already exist in the environment.
Topics
Transcript
[0:00] all the things that you built here because of something inside of you that had this drive to go achieve it. How do you impart that on your kids? >> I think about this all the time and my son is very loving, caring, always watching out for his [music] sister. I don't know what his drive is yet, but I always make him figure it out. So, if he can't figure something out, he'll [music] ask me to help him and I will help him, but I will say, "No, you need to figure another way out. There's always another way." He was trying to climb up this hill out of [music] our creek. He loves playing in…
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