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Stop Saying "Hope." It's Quietly Blocking Everything You Want (Here's What to Say Instead) | Jo Koy

Lewis Howes

Joe Koy shares his 37-year journey from insecure kid to successful comedian, emphasizing the importance of relentless commitment, rejecting the word 'hope,' and continuously showing up to opportunities regardless of obstacles. He discusses how trauma, military influence, and his mother's work ethic shaped his drive to succeed without waiting for permission.

Summary

Joe Koy recounts his rise in comedy starting in 1989, emphasizing that he never said 'hope' because it suggests relying on something beyond one's own talent and effort. He shares how he was discovered by a security guard at a BET's Comic View audition when he approached the promoter directly, leading to his appearance on the show and subsequent opportunities on the Apollo and Def Comedy Jam tour. Koy discusses the racism and structural barriers he faced in the 1980s-90s comedy scene, where comedy clubs had 'white nights' (weekends) reserved primarily for white comics, forcing Black and Asian comedians to perform on Tuesday nights. He describes his early struggles including bombing 25+ times before gaining confidence, driving hours from Vegas with a broken tail light to perform for minimal pay, and even taking the Greyhound bus to auditions. Koy emphasizes that his insecurities about his crooked teeth, hair loss, and sleep apnea were offset by his superpower on stage—the ability to make people laugh. He credits his mother's hustle and entrepreneurial spirit (selling frozen lumpia rolls at work, organizing Filipino community events) and his military stepfather Fred's discipline ('fix your bed, a messy bed is a messy head') for shaping his work ethic. Koy reveals that Netflix initially rejected him, so he self-financed and produced his first special, then pitched it to them—they bought it after seeing it was already produced. He sold out the same Seattle arena where he saw Eddie Murphy perform at age 15, achieving his childhood dream. Koy distinguishes between 'standup' (the art form) and 'gigs' (performances), criticizing corporate events that treat comedians like entertainers rather than serious artists. He refuses to repeat material after releasing specials, treating each hour-long special like a marriage that ends in 'happy divorce.' Currently working on bonus features including a special with Martin Lawrence showcasing 24 underrated headliners. Koy's definition of greatness is doing what you love for nothing—true success comes from passion, not just money.

Key Insights

  • Koy argues that saying 'hope' or 'hopefully' is fundamentally wrong because it implies you're asking for something beyond your own talent to succeed, rather than taking full ownership of outcomes
  • Koy discovered himself by literally walking to the front of an audition line at BET's Comic View, asking a security guard if he could do warm-up, getting the promoter's attention, and being put on stage when scheduled comics didn't show—and this moment changed his entire career trajectory
  • In the 1980s-90s comedy scene, 'white nights' (Friday and Saturday) were reserved almost exclusively for white comedians at major clubs like the Improv, while Black and Asian comedians were offered Tuesday nights or other inferior slots, forcing talented comedians to make 4-5 hour drives for minimal pay
  • Netflix initially rejected Koy's pitch for a special, so he self-financed and produced 'Live from Seattle' himself with his own cameras and crew, then brought the finished product back to Netflix, who then bought it—proving to them they were wrong to pass
  • Koy defines greatness not as making millions of dollars but as doing what you love for nothing—money doesn't validate greatness, passion does, and many people make millions doing things they hate

Topics

Overcoming insecurity through comedyStructural racism in 1980s-90s comedy industryRejecting the word 'hope' in favor of certaintyWork ethic and relentless persistenceSelf-investment and creating own opportunitiesParental and mentor influence on successComedy as serious art formGreatness defined by passion over profit

Transcript

[0:00] I remember reading like this article, pretty sure it was Aerosmith. They said that they used to make their own flyers and Xerox copy them and they would put it on uh windshields everywhere. After I read that, I literally went to Kinko's and taught myself how to make a flyer. >> Really? >> And to this day, look, I can show you a text. I asked my my guy, I I need 10,000 flyers for Netflix cuz I'm about to pass these out >> right now. Yeah. I don't give a I'll stick it in a car window. I don't I am humbled. is a stand-up comedian, [music] actor, and producer with multiple [0:32] soldout Netflix specials. He's…

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